POOCH

Me: "The Distraction wasn't very happy with me today."

Mom: "And why is that?"

Me: "His sweater dried funny so it kept flipping up whenever he would sit down but before we knew that to be the cause we were making fun of him for having a pooch. Then he got mad at me because I kept grabbing at it."

Mom: "Better his pooch than his pouch."

Me: "What's the difference?"

Mom: "Well, his pooch is his belly and his pouch is... his testicles."

Me: "And you think he'd rather I grab his belly?! He's a boy, Mother."

Mom: "You're probably right. What was I thinking?"