I HAVE AN ANNOUNCEMENT TO MAKE

Today, my wonderful, beautiful, delightful sister turned old.

Now, to be perfectly fair, she already was old, I'm just trying to be nice.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, TIFF!!!! LOVE YOU!!!! Check is in the mail!

Also, later, as a special birthday treat, I have Guinness stories (who just rolled over onto his squeak toy and scared the hell out of himself). And, if Adam gets off his butt and sends me those pictures like I requested, Guinness pictures.

* * * * *

This weekend was a weekend of introductions. Adam was introduced to my parents, I was introduced to his parents, Guinness was introduced to (not my) family farm.

Um, yeah.

Now, to his credit, Guinness was wonderfully well-behaved. So well behaved, in fact, that we decided to try letting him off leash while at Adam's parents so he could play and wrestle with Beau (Adam's brother's dog), something he did with gusto. And it was while he was off-leash that we tested him, see, by calling him and praising him when he came. We even attempted this feat at a local playground and he came to me every time he was called (if you count coming into the general vicinity, which I do).

I'm sure a number of you can see where this is going. Try not to ruin it for the slower members of the audience.

While at the family farm the following day, the dogs were again going at it, this time around the pond and we thought that since Guinn had done so well the previous day off-leash that we would reward him for such good behavior. And at first, all was well. And at first, he and Beau wrestled and splashed and Beau body-checked Guinn into the pond (hilarious). And then they started playing chase. And then Guinn got distracted.

I should also maybe mention at this point that Adam's grandpa, the proprietor of the family farm, raises horses. Horses that, while quite friendly (or maybe because they were so friendly) scared the shit out of Guinness.

It might also have been their size.

But here's the thing. Guinness, while certainly not purebred, is a herding breed, and he has show an affinity for such activities by attempting to herd certain things. Namely people, bicycles, and golf carts. So when Guinness saw those horses running, he decided he had to put a stop to it. So he ran, barking like a fool at the horse in front of the herd, who happened to be the largest of the four, who happened to slow down at the sight and sounds of the crazy barking dog.

It was about the time that Guinness reached the herd and the largest of the horses looked down at him while still running in a trot that Guinness realized them sumbitches are BIG.

So he did what came naturally to a yellow-bellied bully. He tucked his tail firmly between his legs and booked it into the barn.

Where the goose was. And the goose... he was a more manageable size.

To be fair, Guinness, apparently, is not the only dog to have ever chased this goose and he did only manage to sniff at it before one of the kids grabbed ahold of him, but needless to say, he is not allowed off-leash at the farm anymore.


And his is not amused.